I'd say the best is when I was in Africa, I saw a hippo in a house. Someone had a pet hippo. And they're meant to be one of the most dangerous animals on the planet, and they had one that was sort of just wandering in and out of their house, just sort of roaming about. -Karl Pilkington Best
At the end of the day, teachers aren't going to mess about trying to make me into an Einstein, 'cause it was never gonna happen. We can't all be brainy, can we? That's just the way the world is. -Karl Pilkington Brainy
I'm not that lazy, but I don't need that much money. I lead a fairly simple life. -Karl Pilkington Money
Sometimes you can know too much. A lot of brainy people like Stephen Fry are quite depressive. -Karl Pilkington Brainy
To be honest, marriage doesn't scare me and that, it's just once you've been together for so long, if you haven't got any kids it's just a big expensive day out for everyone else to enjoy, isn't it? -Karl Pilkington Marriage
People eat duck and you think, well, we've got loads of chickens, leave the ducks alone! -Karl Pilkington Alone
I am into nature and seeing whales. I went whale-watching, and I was really looking forward to that, but when you see it on TV and you see other programs do it, you're seeing close-ups of these massive creatures, and the music that's added gives you a certain feeling. -Karl Pilkington Music
And we've got a toaster and everything. So there is no reason for the wedding. -Karl Pilkington Wedding
I'm not that lazy, but I don't need that much money. I lead a fairly simple life. -Karl Pilkington Life
Yesterday, I did some painting then went out to buy an onion and came home and watched 'University Challenge.' The onion was probably the highlight. -Karl Pilkington Home
I'd say the best is when I was in Africa, I saw a hippo in a house. Someone had a pet hippo. And they're meant to be one of the most dangerous animals on the planet, and they had one that was sort of just wandering in and out of their house, just sort of roaming about. -Karl Pilkington Pet
I'm not a proper traveler. I don't like to be challenged or have too much of a change and prefer a week away just to relax. -Karl Pilkington Change
The poorer people and criminals of Mexico who are not very religious but not quite atheists, either, worship Saint Death. -Karl Pilkington Death