An optimist is a fellow who believes a housefly is looking for a way to get out. -George Jean Nathan Funny
Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life. -Brooke Shields Funny
I was asked to act when I couldn't act. I was asked to sing 'Funny Face' when I couldn't sing, and dance with Fred Astaire when I couldn't dance - and do all kinds of things I wasn't prepared for. Then I tried like mad to cope with it. -Audrey Hepburn Funny
The day I made that statement, about the inventing the internet, I was tired because I'd been up all night inventing the Camcorder. -Al Gore Funny
It's funny when people say, 'I don't think Julia likes me.' Honey, if I don't like you, you're going to know about it. -Julia Roberts Funny
Being funny has always mattered a lot to me. It's why I started acting - to make my friends laugh. -Nick Wechsler Funny
I was the class podiatrist. I never made it to class clown. I wasn't funny enough. I would examine feet and prescribe and ointment. It was a sad childhood. -Gilbert Gottfried Funny
I was lucky. My family is wonderful. And it's funny, because most of my best friends come from very large families. So it always felt as if I had lots of siblings, though in the end I had to leave them and go home. I kind of got the best of both worlds as a kid. -Sophia Bush Funny
I'm sure that my parents' behavior has entered my work, I'm sorry to say. I don't think you need to have a difficult childhood to be funny, but it helps. -Roz Chast Funny
I'm blonde and tanned and normal-sized! I'm sweet, shy, funny, have a big heart and I'm nice - and I like to eat. -Paris Hilton Funny
I'm somebody who believes in funny things, and laughing, but I do like for them to come from a place that addresses the human condition. -Natasha Lyonne Funny
I try to write stories that are thrilling and full of mystery and funny all at the same time, stories that raise moral questions but come up with very few moral answers, stories that emotionally touch readers through the characters. -William Lashner Funny
Is everything funny? For me, yes. There's a positive to every negative. Even my divorce? For me, yes. If you go back and look at it, why it happened or how it happened, there's something in there that'll make you laugh. -Kevin Hart Funny
Being funny is one of my greatest strengths. I can make girls smile when they're down, and when they're having a good time, I can carry on the joke. -John Krasinski Funny
