The beauty is that through disappointment you can gain clarity, and with clarity comes conviction and true originality. -Conan O'Brien Beauty
According to a new survey, 40 percent of adults in Mexico say they would move to the United States if they got a chance. The number would have been higher, but the other 60 percent already live here. -Conan O'Brien Chance
Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you're kind, amazing things will happen. -Conan O'Brien Amazing
The Canadian government continues to say they will not help us if we go to war with Iraq. However, the prime minister of Canada said he'd like to help, but he's pretty sure that last time he checked, Canada had no army. -Conan O'Brien War
The U.S. army confirmed that it gave a lucrative fire fighting contract in Iraq to the firm once run by the Vice President Dick Cheney without any competitive bidding. When asked if this could be conceived as Cheney's friends profiting from the war, the spokesman said 'Yes.' -Conan O'Brien War
Pamela Anderson Lee released a statement confirming that she has had her breast implants removed. Doctors say that Pamela is doing fine and that her old implants are now dating Charlie Sheen. -Conan O'Brien Dating
President Clinton signed a $10 million deal to write a book by 2003. Isn't that amazing? Yes, and get this, not only that, President Bush signed a $10 million deal to read a book by 2003. -Conan O'Brien Amazing
There are few things more liberating in this life than having your worst fear realized. -Conan O'Brien Fear
The Canadian government continues to say they will not help us if we go to war with Iraq. However, the prime minister of Canada said he'd like to help, but he's pretty sure that last time he checked, Canada had no army. -Conan O'Brien Government
