My mother loved entertaining, and I've followed suit, so we have big celebrations for New Year, Passover, Thanksgiving and birthdays. Joan Rivers Thanksgiving
I enjoy life when things are happening. I don't care if it's good things or bad things. That means you're alive. Joan Rivers Good
Every comedian is furious. Age makes me angry. I'm unhappy at not being able to open packages anymore. I'm angry that libraries have gone. I hate children on planes. I'm very shallow, so they tend to be little things. To be honest, I think I was probably angry the day I was born, you know, about diapers or something. Joan Rivers Age
Thank God we're living in a country where the sky's the limit, the stores are open late and you can shop in bed thanks to television. Joan Rivers Thankful
Part of my act is meant to shake you up. It looks like I'm being funny, but I'm reminding you of other things. Life is tough, darling. Life is hard. And we better laugh at everything; otherwise, we're going down the tube. Joan Rivers Life
Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is God's gift, that's why we call it the present. Joan Rivers History