Being a humorist is not a voluntary thing. You can tell this because in a situation where saying a funny thing will cause a lot of trouble, a humorist will still say the funny thing. No matter how inappropriate. P. J. O'Rourke Funny
If I knew for a certainty that a man was coming to my house with the conscious design of doing me good, I should run for my life. Henry David Thoreau Funny
Say what you will about the ten commandments, you must always come back to the pleasant fact that there are only ten of them. H. L. Mencken Funny
You're unlikely to discover something new without a lot of practice on old stuff, but further, you should get a heck of a lot of fun out of working out funny relations and interesting things. Richard P. Feynman Funny
If women ran the world we wouldn't have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days. Robin Williams Funny
One of the funny things about the stock market is that every time one person buys, another sells, and both think they are astute. William Feather Funny
You know the funny thing, I don't get along with rich people. I get along with the middle class and the poor people better than I get along with the rich people. Donald Trump Funny
Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who would want to live in an institution? H. L. Mencken Funny
You can always tell when a man's well informed. His views are pretty much like your own. H. Jackson Brown, Jr. Funny
By all means let's be open-minded, but not so open-minded that our brains drop out. Richard Dawkins Funny